What am I feeling?

I'm bored, a bit frustrated, tired. I think this is the only place right now I feel like expressing myself. I don't know where these feelings are coming from but that is what I am feeling right now. I think this will become my diary of me finally breaking barriers, to become more transparent.

It's funny because I thought I was being transparent but I really was not. I don't even know if I know how to truly be transparent. How do you expose yourself without feeling overly exposed. I find I ask a lot of questions when I am stuck I guess that is not a bad thing because that is the only way you get answers...right?

I have been praying for an understanding of what I am supposed to be doing right now I believe that is being answered but I am just in a place right now.

I am finally documenting this process to see how this goes. I have no clue as to what is about to happen.

What is my level of expertise? How can I make a difference in someones life? What is proper to share? ( I had to put that in here because I just like I needed to say that) Because I do not know who will ever read this I feel like I need to be careful of the things I say. Crazy right.

Well, whatever, that is all I feel like typing right now because my mind is being flooded with thoughts and really I don't think I feel like going through them all right now.

I guess that is why I like making videos because I can talk it out rather than trying to write and then fix errors and re-write. This is crazy...I'm going now...this has been another episode of my chic life.

(where on earth am I going with all of this?) IDK

It's been forever!!!

It is almost about a year since my last blog. OMG! I do not know why I do this I start something and then life starts to happen and I drop it like a hot potatoe. But I am looking to start back once again blogging. It just becomes hard because there is always something I need to do.

I also feel if i don't get quick results or atleast the reults I am looking for once I start a thing I kind of give up. Is that not just the way of my life. I have come to realize I cannot be as transparent as I may think I am. I always have to do things a certain way or I won't do them at all. as the words are coming to me right now I am just going to put it on here simply because I need to break the barriers of my mind. Think everything has to be a certain way, thinking in order for me to feel as though I am doing something worth doing I have to see other people joining in with me. How lame is that?

It is a serious problem I am talking about here. but that is all I want to share right now. That's my chic life.

We will see when the next post will come.

Hopefully I don't procrastinate with my next one.