I have come to realize I have been in a dark place perhaps depression (I was really tryin not to use that word.) Not that it's the wrong word it's just that whoever wants to admit going through any phase of a depression. This is my personal diagnoses but nevertheless it is real. Never have I seen righteous forsaken...that is what I believe and no matter how hard my life becomes I know the more I am honest with myself and honest with God the more FREE I will become. Things are getting clear, not to the point where I know what the heck is going on but enough for me to recognize the freedom and release I feel when I cry out to God. I have come to truly realize there is not much you can hide from God so it is better to just be transparent...